The Sloppy, Lazy ‘Yellowjackets’ season 2 finale is a crushing disappointment

See Coach Ben’s face in the photo above? This is how I feel after watching Yellowjackets Season 2 finale. It’s been a long, long time since I’ve felt this upset about a TV show. It’s been a long time since something went from being so good to so absolutely terrible so quickly. I am Ben’s sad face. I am his disappointment. And like Ben in the final moments of “Storytelling,” I want to burn this show to the ground.

I won’t even summarize. Honestly, I’m not sure this episode deserves a recap. Here’s what I hated about this finale – a finale I hated as much as I loved the Season 1 finale.

In the current timeline, everything is tied up in a nice, perfect, absolutely impossible bow. Just a short while after all the women gather at Lottie’s cult site, Walter shows up. And then Jeff and Callie. And then the two detectives, Kevin and Mustache. They all appear just a little bit before Lottie and the ladies have their little hunting ceremony. So terribly practical! Callie has the gun, so when Shauna draws the queen and the women all decide to actually hunt her down, we know callie will show up just as soon as possible. And she does!

Walter kills Kevin with poison. I said, as he handed him the hot cocoa, “I wonder how much poison he put in the hot chocolate?” Shock! He also manages to convince Mustache – in about ten seconds – that he has a load of dirt on Kevin that makes it look like he killed Adam Martin. So convenient!

Hey, here’s a game: Every time something really practical happens in this episode, have a drink. You will puke when the credits roll. My stomach hurts just writing this.

All my regular readers know I was one of this show’s biggest champions in season 1. It made the list of best shows of 2022. I told anyone who would listen to watch it. I watched the first season three friggin times!

I am heartbroken. Finally, after Callie shoots Lottie, after their stupid, ridiculous, terribly rushed hunting ceremony, Lisa shows up with a shotgun (how convenient!) and threatens to shoot Natalie because for some reason Natalie pulls a knife right there moment (so convenient!) Misty has a poison needle with her (how convenient!) and rushes off with Lisa, but Nat gets in the way and takes the needle instead, dying moments later. This is supposed to be juxtaposed with her letting Javi die, like it’s a fine being paid or something, but it’s ridiculous. The most ridiculous TV death since Eddie friggin Munson.

Look, I hate to say this, but the writers of this series have lost their thread. They obviously don’t understand their own show! Nat was the hero. Now we literally have no one to mess with, which is one of the top five problems I laid out for this show in my article yesterday, even before I knew what happened to her.

What a spectacular fall from grace. Much faster, much more brutal than Lost his decline.

In the final timeline, they slaughter Javi and Ben sees this taking place and decides to burn the cabin down. I was basically cheering at this point. If only he had succeeded. I guess that’s still one person to mess with, but I don’t like Ben’s chances any more than I like this show’s chances for any kind of satisfying third season.

They eat Javi and Lottie is basically fully recovered when the meat is cooked. She tells them that Nat is their leader now, because the wilderness wouldn’t let them kill her bla bla bla. I’m not sure what else to say. Travis took a bite of his brother’s raw heart before tossing it onto his forehead. Guess everything is fixed. So convenient!

This was a bad episode of television, not just a disappointing episode of Yellowjackets. Constructed plot lines. Neat and tidy. As if they were rushing to wrap up all the threads they had turned up. The police plotline was bad, and it was resolved in the most convenient, ridiculous way imaginable. Walter is just a trip deus ex machina. Lottie is taken to a mental hospital. Nat is dead. Shauna is free. Who knows or care where do some of their stories go? Are they just done with the modern timeline now? It went nowhere. We learned nothing about Tai or the man without eyes. Nat basically did nothing the whole season before they die.

The story from the past is a draw now too. The slaughter of Javi was too grotesque and grim for my taste, and I have a strong stomach for this. I’m just terribly, terribly disappointed, and I can’t imagine any fans of the first season watching this and thinking “Oh, yeah, this was satisfying and good!” but then I’m always shocked by people.

0/10. F-. Two thumbs down. What a terrible shame. Here’s hope Succession sticking the ledge. Honestly, I’d be shocked if it didn’t. And maybe Barry will come through. I have a little doubt. I will be writing about both series finals here on this blog, so you should follow me.

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PS My daughter was even more pissed than I was after watching this episode. She went on a long, angry rant about it. She shouted at the TV during the episode. We are not satisfied. Not satisfied at all.